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Peak Performance
November, 2005
Volume: 1, Issue: 2

 Peak Performance

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Events

Contact us for details on upcoming training in Building High Value Relationships(TM)
 
 
2005:
  
   12/5-12/6 
   New Haven, CT
 
2006:
 
  1/23-1/24 
  Seattle, WN
 
  1/30--1/31 
  Chicago, IL
 
  
 
 

Other Events

 
 



Pamela Pound

From the President

 
Happy Thanksgiving!

Thanks for your positive feedback on the first issue of Peak Performance.  Just as we got that issue out the door, the Chicago White Sox were winning the World Series.

Ozzie breathed life into the vision of creating a championship team. He and Kenny Williams charted the course and secured appropriate resources while staying within budget.  Breakdowns and setbacks occurred, and the team handled them while keeping an eye on the prize.  Ultimately, the players aligned with the vision and rose to the occasion.  A great story from both a sports and a management perspective. 

You, too, can rise above the competition in whatever "game" you choose to play.  A unique feature of the business "game" is that the rules of engagement are more fluid than those you'll find in any sport.  This month's feature article offers advice and perspective on how to recognize, create, and work with those rules.

Have a great holiday!

Sincerely, Pam Pound
 
Call 708-651-2483 or email info@pinnaclesuccesspartners.com to request a complimenatry consultation.  Visit us at www.pinnaclesuccesspartners.com

 

In this issue

Groundrules for Interpersonal Effectiveness
A New Thanksgiving Diet
Building High Vaule RelationshipsTM

I used to be the sorest loser, but I've learned that type of attitude prevents you from getting anything out of a defeat."
-- --Hillary Wolf, U.S. Olympic judo team  

groundrules for interpersonal effectiveness

 
What makes some relationships great and others challenging?   Since we're the common denominator in both our good and bad relationships, could it be that success and failure are not in our control? Of course not.

Our attitudes and behavior contribute significantly to the quality of each relationship. And even without explicit buy-in from another person, we can take action to diffuse conflict and move towards a more effective partnership.  As we become more skilled in taking responsibility for the quality of our relationships, we produce better business outcomes with less stress.

Who's Rules?


One of the most common causes of interpersonal conflict flows from the fact that, even when we share common values and objectives with others, we don't all play by the same rules.  In fact, we are often unaware that rules exist.

I remember working with a sales colleague who had recently hired a new assistant.  As part of the interview process, he explained that the work involved time-sensitive projects that sometimes would require overtime. The new assistant confirmed that she was willing to work overtime as needed.

There was a major proposal due at noon on a Friday, and my colleague and his assistant were working furiously on Thursday to get the document in order.  The salesperson had to leave the office for a client meeting and said he'd be back after 5 p.m.  

When he returned at 5:30, he was alarmed to see that his assistant had already gone home leaving the project  incomplete.  He was furious at what he perceived to be a betrayal of trust, and he stormed around the office looking for people to help him finish up. The ad hoc team wrapped it up around 10 p.m.

It Made Sense to Her

 
My colleague returned to the office the following morning to find his assistant bewildered at all the fuss about her 5 p.m. departure.  She had left at 5 p.m., because it was important not to miss her Pilates class.  Her plan was to come to work at 6 a.m. in order to finish the proposal by 11 a.m.
Both parties in this relationship had agreed that time-sensitive projects would be completed "on time." What they hadn't discussed were their personal rules defining "on time" and "overtime." For my colleague, "on time" meant that the project was finished the day before the presentation, so that he could spend the morning mentally preparing. For his assistant, "on time" was anytime before noon, and "overtime" hours could be worked in the morning as well as in the evening.  

The misunderstanding in this case was easily remedied by clarifying performance standards for "on time" and "overtime." My colleague's position gave him authority to set the standards for the future.

Hearing What's Not Said


It's not always that easy.  Sometimes, there is no reporting relationship to dictate whose rules will prevail.  Other times, we are so connected to our rules that we don't consider the possibility that other sets of rules exist. And often we fail to recognize or concede that rules should be changed or negotiated when they don't work.

Unspoken rules are at the heart of every corporate culture. Newcomers pick up on signs of "how we do business here"- from how problems are solved to when and how one can express a business concern or disagreement.  Leaders who want to revitalize an organization need to recognize the existing rules, decide what's worth keeping, and create the space for new rules to replace those that no longer work.

In the context of client service, small rules violations can chip away at relationships until they are damaged beyond repair.  New clients may not be satisfied with the manner in which you provide service to others.  Sometimes they won't tell you that they're unhappy until the day they change providers.

In peer relationships, two individuals can wage a silent and unproductive war over who is supposed to pick up the phone first.

What to Do?


In the face of these challenges, there are several steps you can take to become more effective in recognizing rules and using them to move yourself and your company powerfully forward.

In general:
 
--Recognize that most conflicts arise from disagreement around rules that have not been explicitly disclosed - their or yours.

--Acknowledge that you can avoid or defuse conflict if you are willing to work with the other person's rules.

--Many rules conflicts are as subtle as the rules behind them. Look for signals indicating that you and the other person are not operating from the same play book.

--Know that anyone can change the rules of engagement at any time, and often that's a good idea.

--Recognize that others will tend to operate according to their own rules on matters that do not fall under your supervision and control.

--In talking with others about their business "rules," consider using gentler words such as "standards" and "expectations."

    For situations where you're in charge:

    --Recognize that, unless or until you request a change in behavior and track compliance, most people will continue to play by their own standards and rules.  When back office processes break down, it's often because enforcement of "standards" is lax.

    --As often as possible and appropriate, clarify standards and rules under which decisions will be made and performance will be evaluated.

    For situations where you're not in charge:

    --Point to rules as a way of defusing tension when conflicts arise.  For example, "I notice that the way you like to see this project flow is 1,2,3 and I like to attack it 3, 2, 1. Given our personal preferences, can we find a way to make this work for both of us?" Talking about the rules is much less confrontational that talking about who's right and who's wrong.

    --Rules and standards indicate "how" something should be done.  When there is disagreement on the "how," shift the discussion to connect with the other person on "what" outcome is valuable and important to both of you. After gaining agreement on "what," re-open discussion of "how" best to get there.

    --When the rules are not clear and you can't ask for explicit clarification, offer up your rules for approval.  "I would like to do...  would that work for you?"

    Building High Value Relationships(TM)

     
    Dealing effectively with "rules" conflicts is just one element that contributes to extraordinary outcomes for individuals, teams, and organizations.  It is part of the Building High Value Relationships(TM) (BHVR) program--a two-day workshop that provides a step by step process for creating and delivering extraordinary value in every relationship. 

    We are offering this program to the public for the first time in Chicago next year. Visit our website to find out more about the program.
     
    Pinnacle Success Partners, Inc. offers a complimentary initial consultation to help you uncover and address the opportunities and challenges that will have the greatest impact on YOUR success.  Call 708-651-2483 to request an appointment or send us a message.
     
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    a new thanksgiving diet

    It's Thanksgiving. What a wonderful concept. We have the opportunity to take a moment to consciously say "thank you" not only for what's working well but also for the learning and growth that challenges bring our way.

    I'm probably not the only person on the planet who undervalues my own contribution to the world and my own successes in business.  How easy it is to be dissatisfied by the progress we make, so that the "good stuff" dangles in the future like the proverbial carrot. How easy to look to the next goal and milestone before we have fully appreciated and acknowledged completion of the last one.

    Building a business has been my biggest challenge over the past three years. And there is so much left to do and accomplish in that part of my life. Today I choose to recognize and say "thanks" for the all that I've achieved so far, my new friends and colleagues, the great work that my clients have done in transforming themselves and the companies they lead.

    Beginning today, I also choose to cut the "rehashed recriminations" from the menu, have a steady diet of leftover thanksgiving accolades, and consume large quantities of carrots.  I feel healthier - and happier - already.
     
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    BHVR COMES TO CHICAGO              

    Next January, Building High Value RelationshipsTM (BHVR) comes to Chicago for the first time in a public program.  Block out January 30-31 on your calendar, so that you can improve your capacity to:

    --build your reputation as the "go to" professional in your field - the person who really understands the clients' most important issues and priorities

    --be recognized as a leader who delivers outstanding business results, and

    --find and focus on the opportunities that will have the greatest impact on your success.

    The program will be held on the campus of the Lake Forest Graduate School of Management. Steve Lishansky, creator of the program, will facilitate part of the workshop and be available to help you address your most important challenges.  

    Pinnacle Success Partners, Inc. will offer follow up coaching to deepen your integration of the powerful BHVR principles.

    CLIENTS TALK ABOUT BHVR'S VALUE TO THEM:


    "I can honestly say this is the most unique and successful program we ever offered.  We are so much better at determining what is most important to our customers, and avoiding low value activities that used to overload our people.  The quality of our communication and collaboration is higher, and it happens in much less time."  CIO, MetLife

    "It really works!  BHVR gave us the skills and tools to get the job done, and played a crucial part in launching our company into growth mode.  I recommend this program enthusiastically."  COO, InfoGraphics

    "Successful?  BHVR is one of our highest rated and most popular programs (over 1200 participants) in our corporate university, both in the US and Europe.  As an important part of our emerging leaders' curriculum, it has significantly improved their relationship management skills, and we are seeing dramatically improved business results with their internal teams and external clients." Chief Learning Officer, American Management Systems

    "The day after your 2-day program my team and I solved a huge problem with one of our largest clients that had been festering for 6 months - and did it in less than 1 hour.  BHVR is powerful, practical and fast!"
    VP, Fidelity Investments

    Get more information about the program, or print the registration form.  Register before December 15 to receive a substantial discount on your registration fee.

    © 2005 Pinnacle Success Partners, Inc., All rights reserved
    Phone: 708-651-2483

    Peak Performance is published monthly by Pinnacle Success Partners, Inc.